Day 45 Writing Short Stories

Clarity

Wars are never about right and wrong; that is just the selling bit. The one for the likes of you and me. But like everyone else in my generation, in the army, I bought it. Only after the fact could I see the fishy bits. The things that didn’t fit right. I was blinded by the hatred and the injustice I felt. Still do. It’s a funny feeling to have both truths sit inside you, alive simultaneously.

I was awarded medals for my bravery. They now sit inside the cabins, mocking me. That doesn’t mean I wouldn’t do the things I did again and again. I would do them in a heartbeat. I would sacrifice myself if I could for those in arms with me. I was their wizard. I was meant to keep them safe.

Now the power in me, the one that killed so many of the orcs, the nasty, the ugly, festers inside like a wound I can’t stop bleeding. I hold myself back from using my magic. It seeps out of me, and I accidentally set things on fire that I haven’t meant to. My mood is getting worse.

She comes to me, my commander, she speaks about the past and the future. She, like me, got positions beyond our history and lineage; she’s a politician, one who fights for the rights of all. She will do great things, having moved past the horrendous things she did. But I cannot justify what I did with what I do now. I teach the new generations, but all I do is hate them; I see the same sparkle in them that was in me when the war broke out. They are one line away from killing others in the name of justice, as I had been. Instead of kindness, I hate them. I hate how the war made me, gave me what I have.

She pours me a drink—the elf-kind—one to give me clarity. I have never been able to hide myself from her.

I take her potion and let the bluish liquid swirl down my throat. My head snaps back, and what is and will be opens up inside my mind and body. I hear her whisper her commands, her demands. She wants me to be her right arm. Unlike what I thought, she wants the old ways to come back. I swallow. I know if I surrender, I will have my peace. Her words can be enough. But the idea of a truth, a lie to others, stands between us, and I pretend. I lift my head back up, and meet her eyes, and smile. I will follow, for now.

—

I have been thinking about how to publish my sci-fi book; what is the right way to approach it? I have been going over the edits from my editor. The initial weariness is gone, and I’m content with shaping what needs shaping. The cover is on its way. All that is fine, but there is still the question of how to publish it. It feels counterintuitive to publish it on Amazon Kindle. I want to pursue alternatives. I’m toying with the idea of publishing it here and leaving a coffee cup or Patreon option for readers, but I’m not sure if that is the right way to do it. I will have to think it through.

I had fun writing today’s prompt. It’s an opening for something bigger, or more so, it can be. What I got today was a conversational war story with a rags-to-riches narrative, told in first person. I think I managed to do that. Let’s see what tomorrow brings. Now I will take a break and hunt down some jigsaw puzzles.

Thank you for reading! Have a day of clarity ❤